{"id":2864,"date":"2016-04-23T00:01:26","date_gmt":"2016-04-23T06:01:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.mops.org\/?p=2864"},"modified":"2016-04-23T00:01:26","modified_gmt":"2016-04-23T06:01:26","slug":"the-rhythm-of-rest","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/the-rhythm-of-rest\/","title":{"rendered":"The Rhythm of Rest"},"content":{"rendered":"

When my twins were first born and they would miraculously nap simultaneously, I would lie down on the couch with a spoonful of peanut butter in one hand and the remote in the other and watch reruns of Dawson\u2019s Creek. I was in what one might call \u201csurvival mode,\u201d where all I could manage to do was completely check out. I\u2019ve come to realize that checking out disguises itself as rest, but doesn\u2019t deliver on its promises the way real, restorative rest does. Real rest brings us back to our center while checking out takes us far away from ourselves.<\/p>\n

Real rest is hard to come by though, isn\u2019t it? When someone\u2019s licking your arm and someone else is shooting you with a Nerf gun and someone else is banging a pot with a hairbrush, all you want to do is escape to your phone and start lapping up Instagram like it\u2019s your next meal.<\/p>\n

But at some point, we need to stop relying on survival mode and learn to practice the kind of rest that brings us back to ourselves and back to the moment instead of removing ourselves from a place called now. What this has meant for me is re-learning what is actually restful and then incorporating those resting practices into my life more regularly. Creating a rhythm, so to speak.<\/p>\n

Nurturing a healthy life rhythm starts with a dialogue with yourself. Think of the kind of conversation you might have with a dear friend \u2013 non-judgey, genuinely supportive \u2013 except that you\u2019re having it with yourself. Because you are the dear friend to you. (Revolutionary.)<\/p>\n

You might awkwardly ask yourself: \u201cWhat would you like to do if you had three hours to yourself? What would be fun, delightful, freeing?\u201d Or \u201cWhat do you need today? What does your body need? What does your soul need?\u201d<\/p>\n

A life rhythm is about determining your needs. It includes things you need to do daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, annually. These are things for your body, your mind, your soul, your hygiene. The things that checking out simply can\u2019t nurture.<\/p>\n

One time, during a particularly extended season in the postpartum cave, my husband said to me, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you go to the salon and get your hair … cleaned.\u201d<\/p>\n

Perhaps getting your hair done regularly is something you add to your life rhythm. Maybe it\u2019s five minutes of centering breath or meditation. Maybe it\u2019s taking a multi-vitamin every morning or washing your face. It\u2019s about finding simple practices that help you own the now, not numb it. The trick, I\u2019ve learned, is not so much about the practice itself but actually practicing it.<\/p>\n

Here are some ideas \u2026<\/p>\n

For daily rest:<\/em> a shower, washing your face, time outside (so good for your mental health), the ritual of coffee or tea time, five minutes of writing, stretching, a dose of beauty treatment.<\/p>\n

For weekly rest:<\/em> exercise, creating something \u2014 soup, a collage, a garden, meeting up with an ongoing group of some kind, doing an activity with your kids that you really enjoy.<\/p>\n

For monthly rest:<\/em> a visit with a therapist or a spiritual director or counselor, a visit with a safe friend, finishing a good book, a walk in a particularly beautiful place, a babysitter.<\/p>\n

For quarterly rest:<\/em> booking a hair appointment, attending a creative workshop, taking a lesson that might enhance one of your hobbies, visiting an inspiring place.<\/p>\n

For annual rest:<\/em> a weekend spiritual retreat, a getaway with some girlfriends, a getaway with your partner.<\/p>\n

This is not a checklist or a to-do list. These are ideas you might want to consider as opportunities for recovery and restoration. Begin by thinking about the things in your life that help you return to you. What are those things?<\/p>\n

If you\u2019ve forgotten, it\u2019s OK.<\/p>\n

Some of the deepest and most beautiful parts of us go dormant during certain seasons of life and we have to do the sacred work of waking them back up. This is a beautiful, brazen journey back toward our center. So don\u2019t beat yourself up if you can\u2019t remember one single thing you used to love to do. After all, it\u2019s so hard to think when someone\u2019s licking your arm.<\/p>\n

But maybe tonight, after everyone is finally in bed, you could get an old receipt from your wallet and you could smooth it out and turn it over and jot some notes on the back of it about what would help you breathe. I know going to Paris would help you breathe, I get it. But let\u2019s start with something a little more attainable so that we don\u2019t totally sabotage ourselves right off the bat.<\/p>\n

Once you have a few things written down, consider how those few things might get incorporated into your life \u2013 daily, weekly, monthly.<\/p>\n

Sometimes we need a spoonful of peanut butter and Dawson\u2019s Creek. But usually what we\u2019re really longing for is living from our center. The etymology of rest includes \u201cfreedom from toil.\u201d I love that. What would bring you freedom from toil? Now go give it a whirl, my sister!<\/p>\n

\n

Leeana Tankersley is the author of <\/em>Brazen and <\/em>Breathing Room. She lives in San Diego, California with her husband, Steve, and their three kids: Luke (7), Lane (7), and Elle (4). Learn more about Leeana\u2019s work at leeanatankersley.com<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

\"HD_Cover_Sping2016_blog\"<\/p>\n

This article originally appeared in the Spring\u00a02016 issue of\u00a0Hello, Dearest<\/em>. If you didn\u2019t get a copy and would like your own, you can\u00a0subscribe<\/a>\u00a0to get\u00a0Hello, Dearest<\/em>\u00a0in your mailbox every season. If you subscribe, forward your receipt to\u00a0magazines@mops.org<\/a>\u00a0and we\u2019ll shoot a copy of the current issue in the mail to you for free \u2026 just because we like you.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When my twins were first born and they would miraculously nap simultaneously, I would lie down on the couch with a spoonful of peanut butter in one hand and the remote in the other and watch reruns of Dawson\u2019s Creek. I was in what one might call \u201csurvival mode,\u201d where all I could manage to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":120,"featured_media":2865,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_seopress_robots_follow":"","_seopress_robots_imageindex":"","_seopress_robots_snippet":"","_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"0","_seopress_robots_breadcrumbs":"","_seopress_robots_freeze_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_custom_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_canonical":"","_seopress_social_fb_title":"","_seopress_social_fb_desc":"","_seopress_social_fb_img":"","_seopress_social_fb_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_height":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_title":"","_seopress_social_twitter_desc":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_height":0,"_seopress_redirections_value":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled_regex":"","_seopress_redirections_logged_status":"","_seopress_redirections_param":"","_seopress_redirections_type":0,"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":"","_seopress_news_disabled":"","_seopress_video_disabled":"","_seopress_video":[],"_seopress_pro_schemas_manual":[],"_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable_all":"","_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable":[],"_seopress_pro_schemas":[],"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[117],"tags":[104,347,378,379,70,380,114],"class_list":["post-2864","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-wellness","tag-advice","tag-embrace-rest","tag-habits","tag-rhythm","tag-self-care","tag-soul-care","tag-wisdom"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2864","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/120"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2864"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2864\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2864"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2864"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.themom.co\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2864"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}