I see you. Not that long ago, I was you.
I was wrangling that oversized car-shaped grocery cart as I rounded the corner, hoping not to take out a cardboard display or a random stranger. On my back was the bag of snacks and toys to entertain the fussy toddler in the front seat. I raced through the aisles in an attempt to make it back home before someone needed to go potty.
Patience was the goal as I wrangled kids through the grocery store, balancing a baby and a budget, hoping for a meltdown-free trip to restock my pantry and fridge. Distraction was the name of the game as we entered the checkout lane with its enticing array of candy. Then, came the sigh of relief as we made it back to the car – mission accomplished.
These days I grocery shop leisurely. I can wander the aisles, dig for the freshest produce, and not experience a moment of panic if all of the checkout lines are backed up. And now I’m the older mom smiling at your precious toddler as we pass. You’re keeping it together, one eye on your list, the other on what your child’s shoving in his mouth.
I’m sending you a virtual high-five. I want you to feel seen and known. You’re mothering in a wonderful way, managing a home, and providing for the needs of your family. It’s not often easy, but you take a deep breath and keep going.
Child-free grocery shopping isn’t one of those things that makes the list of parenting milestones. But then it hits you one day that your kids are all in daycare or at preschool. You have a few minutes to dash into the grocery store and grab those items you need.
Let me warn you that you’ll feel a little lost at first. There’s no small body to lift into the grocery cart, no one asking for that giant box of cereal or the cheesy flavored snacks on the endcap. You can cruise through the aisles quickly, focused and not distracted. You’ll even have time for a quick chat with the cashier on your way out.
I’ll let you know, though, that you may be a tiny bit lonely. Without babbling from the baby or yet another question from the toddler, it may seem way too quiet when you’re passing down the bread aisle. No strangers will stop to coo at your baby, ask how old your kids are, or find out their names.
There are many tasks we do as moms that benefit our families. From grocery shopping to loads of laundry, cooking meals to giving baths, we get to perform acts of service to show our love. It can be exhausting. And there’s certainly a time for self-care, for making sure we’re the best version of ourselves so that we can be the best moms for our kids.
But in these years of being in the motherhood trenches, know that we moms who’ve been there applaud you. We see you and admire your sacrifice and your fierce determination to do the job well. So, from this mom – one who’s now in the stage of looking forward to grandkids one day – to you, I encourage you to keep loving, keep giving, keep blessing your family in the mundane, repetitive, seemingly endless tasks.
There’s no blue ribbon or shiny trophy at the end of the day – and certainly no huge cash payout! But there’s a hug, a kiss, or a snuggle before bedtime. There’s an “I love you, Mommy!” on a random Tuesday. That’s your reward, and it’s worth every struggle of the day.
And maybe sometime you’ll see me back in the grocery store, pushing one of those giant carts, trying to manage an adorable toddler who’s a little bit out of control with her grandmother, and you can encourage me!
WANT TO FEEL EQUIPPED TO BE THE BEST MOM YOU CAN BE?
JOIN THE MOMCO FOR COMMUNITY, EMPOWERMENT, AND MORE.