When Your Kids Won’t Listen:

When Your Kids Won’t Listen:

Welcome to the Club, Mom

Let me paint a picture: You’re standing in the kitchen, holding a spatula like some kind of mom-wielded scepter, calling out for the fourth time, “Dinner’s ready!” But instead of a peaceful family meal, it’s like talking to a herd of invisible cats. One kid’s lost in a video game, another is “exploring” the art of glitter glue in the living room, and the baby is attempting to climb the furniture like a mountain goat. Sound familiar? 

Kids not listening?

Yeah, we’ve all been there. It’s part of the job, right? But here’s the thing: it doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. It doesn’t mean your kids are wild animals (though some days, maybe you’re convinced they are!). It means you’re raising little humans who have their own minds, wills, and yes, selective hearing. 

The Raw Truth (It’s Not You, It’s Them) 

Let’s be real for a second: sometimes, when your kids don’t listen, it feels like a personal attack. Like they’re out to sabotage your sanity or prove some twisted point that they can indeed ignore every word that comes out of your mouth. But here’s a truth bomb: it’s normal. It’s not personal. And it’s not a reflection of your worth as a mom.

Kids are wired to test boundaries, push limits, and generally march to the beat of their own drum (sometimes a drum they found in the basement at 6 a.m. on a Saturday). But that doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means they’re learning. Painfully, slowly—yes—but learning. 

Listening is a Skill 

Here’s something many people don’t realize: listening isn’t just about hearing words; it’s a skill. It takes time for kids to figure out how to prioritize what they hear and respond appropriately. And—spoiler alert—they’re not naturally great at it. But that doesn’t mean all hope is lost!

Think about how God calls us to listen to him. “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10, ASV). Yeah, we’re not always great at that, either, are we? Just like our kids, we sometimes tune out what God’s saying because we’re caught up in our own stuff. So, maybe cut your kids a little slack—it’s a process for all of us. 

Practical Tips (Because We Need More Than Just Coffee) 

Okay, so how do we actually get our kids to listen? Here’s the fun part—when it comes to kids, real-life tips may not work every time, but hey, they’re worth a shot: 

  1. Get on Their Level: Physically crouch down, look them in the eye, and speak calmly. It makes them feel seen and heard—and less like you’re a foghorn blaring orders from the sky. 
  2. Short and Sweet: Keep instructions short. No ten-minute TED Talks, okay? “Shoes on,” “Teeth brushed,” “Toys cleaned up”—these are the magic words. 
  3. Offer Choices: Give them some control. “Do you want to brush your teeth before or after the story?”—kids love a good choice, even if both options get you what you want. 
  4. Follow Through: They need to know you mean business. Set expectations and follow through. Don’t threaten consequences unless you’re actually going to deliver (yep, even if it’s inconvenient). 

Encouragement for the Road (With a Side of Grace) 

When your kids won’t listen, you’re not alone. You’re in the trenches with the rest of us, fighting the good fight. But take heart, mama—God’s got this. “Train up a child in the way he should go, and even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6, ASV). You’re planting seeds, even if it feels like you’re just shouting into the void.

So, pour yourself another cup of coffee (or tea, or protein shake, or whatever keeps you going) and know this: they may not be listening now, but they’re absorbing more than you think. And one day, when they’re adults navigating their own lives, they’ll remember the way you patiently, lovingly, (and sometimes through gritted teeth) taught them. 

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